OK – very short and sweet. Five points from the wedding yesterday
1. QILF – thats a proper term that trended on Twitter yesterday. Although I love the sentiment, I think it should be PILF. Otherwise you sad fucks are cracking one off to an old lady dressed as a budgie.
2. Harry. WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED TO YOUR SHOULDERS. Did you spend the night before dressed as an American Footballer and forget to take the pads out? Your shoulders are MASSIVE!
3. Pippa. Hubba. Well done you for being shot from behind for the benefit of 2 billion people and 100’s of newspapers. All of whose readers/watchers husbands had to shift in their seats and rearrange their undercarriage. Nice.
4. Willam and Kate. Firstly – congratulations. I am not really a Royalist, but you guys seem really nice and grounded. I probably wouldnt invite you to my house if I was ever on “Come Dine With Me”, but then you probably wouldnt accept. However, if you ever popped in to “The Castle” to watch the Sunday 4pm match then I would deffo buy you both a Guiness. And bearing that where I live is on a river, its only a little sail away (ish).
5. No more needs to be said. I hope you are still doing this in 5 years….

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